“In love with the idea of not being alone”.
Every other teenager living in a society declared to be doomed has a common point of view. The cynical idea of never finding love. 'Thanatophobia' is commonly known as the fear of losing someone you love but there’s no word to describe the fear of having exactly what you want. The ultimate question is, why is the idea of having someone love you so scary? Attachment and bonds formed around the threads of love are like bleach and
ammonia. Two common individuals, if formed a bond, can release toxic vapors. Holding onto someone with so much love can intoxicate our fragile systems soon to turn into toxic turmoil.
When you find someone who is exactly what you needed to cure your void of nothingness, you can never let go. It turns into an undeniable cycle of dependence. It’s the vulnerability of never being able to satisfy ourselves that ruins our idea of love.
Depending on another human for consistent validation and longing; Be it a friend or significant other, there’s always the fear of letting them go But there’s always a solution to our generational problems; magic. Just like baking soda is the magic neutraliser to our chloramine toxicity, self-love is the magic to our fear of dependency. Someone else’s love won’t save you from your demons. “Love won’t be my saviour, I should let it go”.
.So go own your heart first before you let someone else lease it for free
Hi, I'm Aashi. I enjoy overloading myself with extracurriculars as a distraction so my life is like the perfect chaotic bliss. I'm not a very social person so I love keeping my twisted mind company. You can often find me with a book or with my very loving cats who run away when I try hugging them. On the contrary, I hate hugs but I always find myself craving one. We exist. The inspiration for my pieces simply come with the experiences of emotional overload but my love for writing is all about finding a personal safe space to pour my feelings into.
Click here to read Aashi's second submission for the issue!